Caretaking: Codependent You May…….. #1

    • think and feel responsible for other people for other people’s feelings, actions, choices, wants, needs, well-being, lack of well-being, and ultimate destiny.

Let’s see if I meet these qualifications:

Do I think and feel responsible for other people’s feelings, actions, choices, wants, needs, well-being, lack of well-being, and ultimate destiny?   When I chose to have my second son, James- my husband chose to stay with me (out of choice because he thought that I would NOT do a good job as a mother on my OWN).  Should I feel responsible?  No.  Does he MAKE me feel responsible? I suppose.  For my children, I can say without a shadow of a doubt I think and feel responsible ALL the time.  Why?  Well, because they are children, and it isn’t like they can go out and work for themselves.  So I guess, anyone who has children would naturally fit into this category.  Qualification 1. MET

How about you.  Are you Caretaking for a Codependent Person?  

 

Suggested by a friend, forgotten by me but usually a routine:

http://will.tip.dhappy.org/projects/unsorted/project/media/text/Melodie%20Beattie%20-%20Characteristics%20of%20Codependent%20People.html

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4 thoughts on “Caretaking: Codependent You May…….. #1

  1. If your spouse stayed with you because he didn’t think you’d be able to be a good mother, that shows some codependence on his part. It does a disservice to both you and him. You’re a capable adult. He didn’t have confidence in your abilities and to make himself feel better about that he felt the need to step in to solve a ‘problem’ that was actually nonexistent. He tried to rescue the situation.

    Note, too, that it’s not codependent to do for others things they are truly UNABLE to do for themselves, as long as you don’t neglect your own self-care. So, being a mother doesn’t necessarily mean being being codependent.

    An example of feeling responsible for others’ feelings would be…well, say you were bored and wanted company & called me wanting to
    go see a movie or something. Then I say I’m already engaged for the evening & offer to meet another day. You might feel disappointed & lonely & still bored….but YOU are responsible for those feelings. If I felt responsible for YOUR feelings, then that would be a codependent trait.

  2. I’m glad you decided to do a series based on this. It’ll help me to be more mindful of my own codependent traits. By talking about what I’m learning, it becomes more naturally part of my thought processes. 🙂

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